If you are sitting on the couch late at night clicking through channels, thinking about how much your feet hurt from being on them all day, have a credit card handy, and stumble onto an infomercial for WalkFit Platinum Orthotics, CHANGE THE CHANNEL PRONTO before you get sucked into an automated-ordering-system nightmare like I did!!
It went like this. I wore brand new blingy, bejeweled sandals to work with my Halloween costume, which caused my feet to hurt like the dickens by the end of the day. So my tootsies are propped on the coffee table, lubed up with Mentholatum Rub in comfy socks in order to find some relief, and I click on a program called "Oh, my aching feet" or something like that. Right there on the screen, straight from the Mall of America with a crowd of enthusiastic fans, is a real doctor telling me I can have immediate relief from foot pain -- as well as ankle, knee, hip and back pain! -- if I would only order a pair of WalkFit Platinum Orthotics. Plus, if I order in the next 20 minutes, I will get a bottle of soothing peppermint foot lotion, a sandal adaptor kit, and a plush pair of Memory Foam slippers for FREE! My feet screamed out, "Get your phone and credit card," so I did.
Big freakin' mistake!! What ensued was 30 minutes worth of aggravation stuck in the neverending-robo-ordering-loop-from-hell! At first, the recorded lady, I'll call her Robo-bitch, was pleasant and accommodating. She asked me to say "yes" or press 1 to confirm everything I entered into the phone or wanted. How kind of her. Then when she asked for my shoe size for the WalkFit orthotic, I said, "eight-and-a-half," but she repeated "eight." Um, no, I didn't say "eight." She didn't ask for confirmation or wait for me, though, she just barreled into her next spiel about all my "free" gifts if only I will pay for additional shipping and handling. When she got to the part about my free slippers, I was so pissed off that I didn't hear what shoe sizes corresponded to their small, medium or large options. I asked her to repeat, she wouldn't. I asked her again to repeat the sizes, she ignored me and there went my slippers straight into the cyber-suck zone! At first, I am pleasant and calmly say, "Customer service, please." Robo-bitch won't stop talking. I start pressing zero, the universal code for "customer service, please," but she only speeds up her non-stop tirade of additional "free" offers of Glucosamine (a 30-day supply, then only $19.95/month automatically billed to my credit card after that), $50 Visa-shopping card (if only I'll try their store-coupon program "that will save me tons of money on valuable items for only a $29.95/month automatically billed charge"), and I don't know what all else she was offering me because by that time I was screaming "DECLINE" into the phone and pushing any button that my spastically twitching fingers could find. The more I screamed and hit the buttons, the faster Robo-bitch talked. When she finally said, "Your order will ship in 7 to 10 days, thank you for choosing WalkFit," I was hoarse and shaking so from frustration that I had to slam some wine with my allergy pills to get to sleep. Thank God, the nightmare was finally over!
But wait, the nightmare was far from over. Yesterday I got to spend 20 WalkFit-fun-filled minutes trying to cancel my order with Sam, the customer service lady, and Joey, her supervisor. They were actual people but no less aggravating than Robo-bitch because they barely spoke English except to say, "We regret that your order cannot be canceled because the automated transaction has already been processed." They repeated this over and over until I finally gave up. At least they did assure me that my WalkFit Platinum Orthotic in size eight will fit my size eight-and-a-half feet and they added on the free slippers in a small -- for only $7.95 additional shipping and handling. Of course. So I'm getting a pair of orthotics. And, I get to endure the phenomenally frustrating WalkFit customer service system again on Monday when I have to call back in order to get the $7.95 refunded on my credit card as compensation for my "unfortunate experience."
I just hope wearing the orthotic hurts less than ordering it did!
It went like this. I wore brand new blingy, bejeweled sandals to work with my Halloween costume, which caused my feet to hurt like the dickens by the end of the day. So my tootsies are propped on the coffee table, lubed up with Mentholatum Rub in comfy socks in order to find some relief, and I click on a program called "Oh, my aching feet" or something like that. Right there on the screen, straight from the Mall of America with a crowd of enthusiastic fans, is a real doctor telling me I can have immediate relief from foot pain -- as well as ankle, knee, hip and back pain! -- if I would only order a pair of WalkFit Platinum Orthotics. Plus, if I order in the next 20 minutes, I will get a bottle of soothing peppermint foot lotion, a sandal adaptor kit, and a plush pair of Memory Foam slippers for FREE! My feet screamed out, "Get your phone and credit card," so I did.
Big freakin' mistake!! What ensued was 30 minutes worth of aggravation stuck in the neverending-robo-ordering-loop-from-hell! At first, the recorded lady, I'll call her Robo-bitch, was pleasant and accommodating. She asked me to say "yes" or press 1 to confirm everything I entered into the phone or wanted. How kind of her. Then when she asked for my shoe size for the WalkFit orthotic, I said, "eight-and-a-half," but she repeated "eight." Um, no, I didn't say "eight." She didn't ask for confirmation or wait for me, though, she just barreled into her next spiel about all my "free" gifts if only I will pay for additional shipping and handling. When she got to the part about my free slippers, I was so pissed off that I didn't hear what shoe sizes corresponded to their small, medium or large options. I asked her to repeat, she wouldn't. I asked her again to repeat the sizes, she ignored me and there went my slippers straight into the cyber-suck zone! At first, I am pleasant and calmly say, "Customer service, please." Robo-bitch won't stop talking. I start pressing zero, the universal code for "customer service, please," but she only speeds up her non-stop tirade of additional "free" offers of Glucosamine (a 30-day supply, then only $19.95/month automatically billed to my credit card after that), $50 Visa-shopping card (if only I'll try their store-coupon program "that will save me tons of money on valuable items for only a $29.95/month automatically billed charge"), and I don't know what all else she was offering me because by that time I was screaming "DECLINE" into the phone and pushing any button that my spastically twitching fingers could find. The more I screamed and hit the buttons, the faster Robo-bitch talked. When she finally said, "Your order will ship in 7 to 10 days, thank you for choosing WalkFit," I was hoarse and shaking so from frustration that I had to slam some wine with my allergy pills to get to sleep. Thank God, the nightmare was finally over!
But wait, the nightmare was far from over. Yesterday I got to spend 20 WalkFit-fun-filled minutes trying to cancel my order with Sam, the customer service lady, and Joey, her supervisor. They were actual people but no less aggravating than Robo-bitch because they barely spoke English except to say, "We regret that your order cannot be canceled because the automated transaction has already been processed." They repeated this over and over until I finally gave up. At least they did assure me that my WalkFit Platinum Orthotic in size eight will fit my size eight-and-a-half feet and they added on the free slippers in a small -- for only $7.95 additional shipping and handling. Of course. So I'm getting a pair of orthotics. And, I get to endure the phenomenally frustrating WalkFit customer service system again on Monday when I have to call back in order to get the $7.95 refunded on my credit card as compensation for my "unfortunate experience."
I just hope wearing the orthotic hurts less than ordering it did!
